#328: Can You Be Your Own Business Coach?

Working with a business coach is not for everyone.

But that begs the question: can you (or should you) coach yourself? And if so how could you benefit from going at it on your own?

Spoiler alert: Yes, I believe you can coach yourself to a certain extent. And depending on how you approach it, you could get valuable benefits from doing so.

In this episode, I explore this idea further and offer advice for how to be a more effective coach to yourself. And I include examples of what I do in between engagements with my own coach.

There’s a lot more detail in the audio version. You can listen to the show using the audio player below. Or you can subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music or wherever you listen to podcasts.

Key Topics and Bullets:

  • Benefits of Working with a Coach
  • Benefits of Journaling as a Tool for Productive Internal Conversation
  • Scheduling journaling everyday
  •  Expressing gratitude
  • Having conversations with one’s higher self
  • Brainstorming
  • Role-playing
  •  Identifying gaps, connections, and patterns
  • Confronting fears and anxieties
  •  Gaining divinely inspired insights
  • Insight 1: Trusting oneself and recognizing resourcefulness
  • Insight 2: Acknowledging the need to ask for help and being more vulnerable
  • Insight 3: Waiting for intuition and being patient to recognize the right path
  • Insight 4: Acknowledging own capability to get things done and recognizing it as a gift
  • Final Insight: Recognizing the importance of relationships and asking for help when needed

Timestamp Overview:

00:00  So this is an interesting podcast episode title, one that I usually don’t go with, but It’s a question. Can you be your own business coach? And I wanna give you the spoiler right out of the gate. The answer is yes. You can to a certain extent. And I wanna tell you that right away because I didn’t want you to think that this episode is about me trying to sell anyone into working with me, as a coach.

03:55  I look to see what kinda attitude that person is bringing to the table, the mindset they have, belief in themselves. So do they believe in themselves? Now they may be at a low point, and that’s okay. We’ve all been there. But is there, at the core, a sense of belief in themselves and their abilities? And very important, do they believe in me? Do they believe that I can work with them to help get them to a better place? That’s important. And the reason I say that might sound kind of a no-brainer, but I’ve had people contact me in the past who want help, and everything is checked out. But I could tell that they didn’t quite believe in me. They didn’t or they didn’t know. Maybe they were very new to my world, and they just didn’t quite believe that I may be able to help them.

08:08 Another thing would be accountability. So working with someone can provide some much needed accountability. Different coaches offer different levels or types of accountability that they work on, but that accountability would definitely be a factor. Another benefit would be, getting ideas, strategies, systems, things that you don’t have to figure out on your own. You know? So if somebody has already created something that works in a certain area, No reason for you to reinvent the wheel there. You know, it’s nice when a coach can bring in some tools and systems, strategies, ideas, and insights that you can apply right away and get your results faster. Another one would be a conversation. Just the fact that you have someone you can have open and honest and thoughtful conversations with and have some Socratic dialogue, for example, which I love to do.

09:54 That’s really, really powerful. You start as you talk, you see the ideas emerging and surfacing, and that’s a really powerful process. Along with that, you get clarity. Clarity is a really important benefit. I think one of The biggest things we’re missing and that we yearn for is better clarity. We have so many inputs these days that And, you know, especially if you’re the kind of person who lives in their head or, you know, who works alone like many of us do, and it’s just you know, that internal conversation can really muddy the waters. So getting that clarity is important. And finally, and this is not the last one, but this is the last one I thought of that’s definitely big is confidence.

15:20 Again, I’m sticking with the idea of conversation, the ability to have this conversation with yourself. I think another important element to having a productive conversation is, gratitude, expressing gratitude. And I do it in a couple of different ways. And when I’m journaling, I end my session with a list of things that I’m grateful for, and I just write it out. I am grateful for x. I am grateful for y. I might even add a sentence that explains or details why I’m grateful for that. Sometimes, it’ll be some of the same things.

18:37 How can you get clarity if you’re, you know, quote, unquote, coaching yourself. Well, just the act of putting it all on the page, you know, with journaling is extremely powerful. Again, it gets it out of your head, helps you see gaps, holes, connections, patterns, even when I’m resisting in a big way because I don’t think it’s going to help. Like, I’ve already thought this through. In my head, I’ve had this conversation multiple times. So what’s the point? I still force myself to get it on the page, and I get that clarity every time, which is why I force myself to do it because I just trust that even if it’s just a little nugget or even if it’s just a confirmation that I’m on the right track, then that’s that that’s great. That’s still a huge benefit. So seeing those gaps, those patterns, those connections, sometimes it helps me see how ridiculous a certain fear that I have might be.

19:40 I need to see that it’s my inner critic, in many cases, just doing his thing and just trying to keep me safe. It’s my ego using the inner critic to keep me in line because I’m about to do something that I’m uncomfortable with but could lead to personal growth. And my ego wants to keep me safe and in line, doesn’t want me growing. That’s risky. And when I can see that. When I can see what’s going on, I can detach from the situation. Again, clarity. I think just this whole process of just having that conversation with myself, especially in writing, helps me see that I’m not alone.

22:52 It can be helpful. And just that shared experience, you know, that feeling of that shared experience that it’s not just me. That’s pretty much everybody. Whether they admit it or not, that makes me feel so much better. So, again, all that under the umbrella of clarity. And then the last area I think you can really gain some benefits from is confidence, improved confidence. Now this is maybe the hardest one to do or to get on your own, but I think you can still boost your confidence if you are taking the time to coach yourself a little bit every day and to work on yourself. And by confidence, I mean, confidence that that you’re not alone.

27:21 I had been journaling about this for a few days, but 1 morning, it just kind of all came together doing one of my journaling sessions. And it did so in a way that frankly felt like exactly what I needed to to hear, and it just kinda came out of nowhere. So I wanted to just summarize the highlights of the guidance that I receive, which personally, I feel that this was divinely inspired. You can take that as you wish, but I really feel that it came from somewhere else. Because when I read it later, I realized that I don’t. I don’t know if that really came from me, or entirely from me. The reason I wanna share it with you is just to give you a glimpse into what I have experienced can be the kind of insights you can get from this process. It’s gonna be a little awkward for me to share this with you because this was never meant to be published. This is really a private conversation that I’m having with myself in my journal.

31:49 I’m better at this than almost anyone I know, meaning getting done. I have incredible stamina and determination. And even though that can be a liability sometimes, I need to see it for the gift it is. And finally, the final insight was, I know people. By that, I mean that I have a great reputation within my network and in my market. And there are people out there I know who can help me, people I can tap into. And I recognize that I know more people than I think. And at the end of the day, relationships will save the day.

33:50 And, you might not be tapping into anywhere near as much as you have access to. So I hope this monologue has been helpful for you. I I hope it’s inspired you to maybe try some new things, and I Appreciate you being a listener of the show. I appreciate your loyalty, and the fact that you Listen to to these episodes and share some of the ones that resonate with you. And in fact, I have a request for you, Just a small ask. If this episode is, it’s something that’s resonating with you, has resonated with you, and you think there are others who could benefit from it. I would really appreciate your sharing it with that person or those people you think would get something out of it. That’s how the show has grown over the past 10 years, and it’s all been word-of-mouth.

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